Welcome Quickstoppers!

If you've arrived here via the link on the latest 'Masters of Song Fu' page, then Welcome!

On the off-chance you enjoyed my entry into the first round (which is due to be made available later this week), you can find a wealth of additional music for free download (as well as real, physical CDs) by clicking this link right here.

More details can be found at the following places:-

www.lunacyboard.com

'The Lunacy Board' have three albums of quirky, eclectic rock, one available as a free download. If you like Pink Floyd, Krautrock, The Bonzos, or other cerebral rock music, it's worth a try.

someotherscotland.blogspot.com

'Some Other Scotland' is my weekly fiction podcast, based around a warped version of current events in Scotland.

www.the-deserters.co.uk

'The Deserters' date back into the early 80's - a world away, but worth a trip for the sheer hell of it.

twitter.com/MickBordet

If you do the twitter thing, this is my feed - find out about the latest new music from chez Bordet as it happens.

Thanks for visiting, and don't forget to vote!

Masters of Song Fu - Round-up and In The Flesh

Just to finish off the Song Fu experience and tie up any loose ends, I have stuck all the songs together up on Last.fm, which is worth a look as a way to find new music similar to what you already listen to.

Last week I made the trip back West to see one of the 'Masters of Song Fu', Jonathan Coulton, doing his thing live on stage in Glasgow. A great show, slightly curtailed by the management of the Oran Mor imposing a 10pm curfew - probably the earliest finishing gig I've ever attended. A great night's entertainment all round, with plenty of amusing between-song banter - something often sadly lacking in many modern acts. Mr Coulton enthusiastically embraces the creative commons licence, meaning that live recordings and videos are positively encouraged. So here is my recording of his Glasgow show:-

Jonathan Coulton - Oran Mor, Glasgow, UK - 25th Oct 2008

We were supposed to be seeing the 'Bad Shepherds' next week. They're a folk band playing punk songs, and include ex-members of Jethro Tull and Iona within their ranks, as well as former 'Young One' Ade Edmonson. However, their tour has been cancelled for reasons still unknown (no details as yet on their website. Pretty annoying.

Masters of Song Fu - Update #11 - Bad Fish (The Song From 'Jaws')

You must choose one of those 1970’s Williams-scored Spielberg/Lucas flicks (JAWS, CLOSE ENCOUNTERS OF THE THIRD KIND, 1941, or STAR WARS). and write "The Song From..." that the film never had, in the style of a 1970’s pop tune (particularly in your instrumentation).

And thus ended Song Fu...

Here is my final non-competitive effort. The instrumentation could have been a bit more lush and over-the-top, but I was running too short of time for such luxuries. The bassline is a bit more mundane than when I first recorded it, as it became the subtle reference I mentioned last time. Then I blew any subtlety away in the last few bars as the bass reveals itself much more blatantly - it's super-corny, but I just couldn't resist it. Sorry.

Click here to hear the song

I don't know whether there are plans for another run of the Song Fu challenge and, if there are, whether I should re-apply. A couple of the deadlines have been pretty tight (usually due to being away with work), but I've got 4 new songs out of it of varying quality, with inspiration for a couple more. What do you reckon?

Anyway, here are the lyrics and chords:-

[verse 1]
C              Gm7
  My, what big teeth you have, 
         Am             F
Said the swimmer to the fish
    C                    Gm7
One drop (of blood) in a million
    Am             F
And she became the dish
       C        Bb     Fmaj7   Fmaj7
of the day.
       C        Bb     Fmaj7   Fmaj7
of the d   -    a   -  y.

[verse 2]
The mayor of "Shark City" is
A sceptic through and through
Ignoring the problem until it
Swims up and bites you
on the ass

[chorus]
         C   F
It was a bad fish
       Am               Gm7->Bb
Like a piscine Jack the Rip-per
  C   F
A bad fish
 Am           Bb
A giant psychopathic kipper
 Fmaj7 x4 bars

[verse 3]
Swapping tales of scars
With buddies and a drink
You'll need a bigger boat
This one's going to sink
fairly soon

~Chorus~

[verse 4]
You'd be a much more efficient killer
If you didn't have that tell-tale fin
And you could still be alive today
If you'd swallowed that oxygen
Smile you son of a bitch

~Chorus~

Fade out on Fmaj7

Lunacy Board Downloads

I've had a few queries about making the Lunacy Board albums available on iTunes or similar, which I can finally answer, having looked into a number of possibilities. iTunes is not really an option for us at the moment, though I wouldn't rule it out forever. For the moment we're going with a crowd called 'Scotloads', who (surprise, surprise) focus on Scottish bands.

I say 'for the moment', because they have a pricing scheme which I think is too steep for downloads, with a fixed price of £7.99 for an album. This is pretty reasonable compared to high street CD prices, but is actually more than our standard CD price for UK buyers (though it is a bit of a saving for overseas listeners).

What is good about their system is that it will allow you to listen to a clip from every track on both albums before buying, as well as letting you buy single tracks for 79p each. Hopefully a more reasonable alternative for album downloads will be available soon, but if you just want a couple of tracks - go for it!

Just click on the scotloads logo above to see The Lunacy Board on their site.

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Tags: Lunacy Board, Quintilis, Eponymous, Debut, Stockholm, Downloads

Masters of Song Fu - Update #8 - The Ballad of Rufus Amos Adams

Your task is to write a country ballad - using a backstory of your own creation – called "The Ballad of Rufus Amos Adams".

Here's the song for Round 3 of the Song Fu challenge (you know, the one I was knocked out of at round 1):-

Click here for the song

For some background to the song and the additional challenge I set myself, see this post. It does include all the items I mentioned, including a wobbly theremin-pretending-to-be-a-pedal-steel-guitar solo. Having now listened to the other challengers I realise that there was no yodelling, but I don't know that would sit very well in a ballad, plus it was not in my original list, so too bad.

Here are the lyrics and chords (non-Scottish readers - minor translations included - move your mouse over a word you don't understand):-

[verse1]
  G        G           C               G
I left the farm in the morning, around 6
G       G             D       D
Fed the cattle on the way
G                G         C          G
Headed South for Dallas to pick up my girl
G                  G         D        D 
And that's when my life went astray.

[verse2 - same chords as v1 except last line]
She was waitressin' in the Korean restaurant
Noodles on poodles she'd serve
When a truck, red 'n' green, with the name of Christine
    G              D          G         G
Too fast round the corner did swerve

[verse3]
Gm                 Gm      Cm        Cm
What happened just then, I fail to recall
       Gm       Gm           Dsus4    D7
But my world it descended to Hell
          Gm         Gm          Cm     Cm
There was kimchi and shitzhu and bodily parts in
    Gm         Gm              Dsus4    D7
The rubble and dust where they fell

[verse4 - same chords as v3 except last line]
I grabbed the truck driver and gave him a kickin'
For killin' my sweetheart so swell
But she wasn't dead - she'd just banged her head
Gm          D7          Gm         G
And I spent time in the Bar-L


[chorus]
G                        C
I'm known around here as Amos Adams
G                     D
Sometimes as Rufus or Hank
       G                   C
I'd consider it lucky if I lived in Kentucky
  G                  D
Instead of a village just West of Buckie
          G                    C
Where the trains are sporadic, money is tight
  G                       D
A bottle of Talisker gets you through the night
  G                   C
I wish to God that my Mama, that sod,
    G        D              G         G
Had named me something like Shug.

[verse5 - same as v2]
Let out of prison this Christmas just past
I hoped for a change in my luck
When I got home she wrote, on a tiny wee note
"I've left with the man and his truck"

[instrumental verse - same as v2]

[verse6 - same as v2]
Now I'm only a jakey from a wee Scottish town
But my life's like a Johnny Cash song
My name isn't Sue, but Rufus will do
I guess Nashville is where I belong

~Chorus~
... Had named me something like Tam.
... or named me something like Doug
... or even something like Shug

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Tags: Song Fu, Country, chords

Masters of Song Fu - Update #5 - The C5 Shuffle

Your challenge is to choose a famous inventor and craft a song proposing a “dance craze” based on either the inventor or one of his/her most well known inventions.

Just finished mixing this non-submission to Song Fu.

Here is a link to the song.

It's called 'The C5 Shuffle' and the inventor in question is, of course, Sir Clive Sinclair. For those outside the UK or too young to remember, Sir Clive designed the best-selling home PC in the UK. It was pretty wretched, even for its own time, but was the door into computing for thousands. His follow-up invention was eagerly anticipated, but the battery-powered C5 was something of a failure, being both before its time and far from reliable or even practical. There are plenty of them still about, see here, but I think I've only ever seen one on the roads myself. From the way the vehicle is driven in the picture and the chorus of the song, it should be pretty clear how the dance works.

Here are the lyrics for the song, along with some chords for the musically inclined:-

[Verse1]
G
Trundling along
B
So close to the ground
C
3 wheels are spinning, but
Cm
what's that clicking sound?

Watch out for the fumes
Roundabouts are deadly
Hills are out of bounds
In our electric pedalled medley

[chorus]
      G            D  D7  Dm7
We're gonna do the C5
     C            G  G6 G       D
It's kinda like a three-wheeled jive
Invented by good old Sir Clive
Let's take it for a Microdrive
And the Hoover motor might contrive
To get us all home alive

[Verse2]
Arms close to your sides
Grab the handlebars
Shoulders up and down
Wiggling your arse
Battery's gone flat
Pedal for a while
Now get out and push
You're dancing with such style

[chorus]
We're gonna do the C5
It's kinda like a three-wheeled jive
Invented by good old Sir Clive
Let's take it for a Microdrive
And the Hoover motor might contrive
To get us all home alive


Gm                   F                       C2      Am7
I've got used to the scornful looks from the passing cars
Gm                     F               Am7        C2
and their comments and mocking tone so derisory
Gm                             F                   C2         Am7
But they'll be laughing on the other side of their faces
Gm                F         Am7           D              D(higher)
In 10 short hours once I've recharged the battery

[Verse3]
Arms close to your sides
Grab the handlebars
Shoulders up and down
Wiggling your arse
Battery's gone flat
Pedal for a while
Now get out and push
You're dancing with such style

[chorus]
We're gonna do the C5
It's kinda like a three-wheeled jive
Invented by good old Sir Clive
Let's take it for a Microdrive
And the Hoover motor might contrive
To get us all home alive

[alt chorus]
We're gonna do the C5 (ah ah ah)
It's a miracle we're stayin' alive 
We're gonna do the C5 (it's so delicious and moist)
I dunno how we're still alive
We're gonna do the C5 (we're heading for home)
Let's hope we all arrive alive

---

Tags: Song Fu, Inventor, invention, dance, Clive, Sinclair, C5

Re: Your Brains

I've just completed a couple of tracks (bass and guitar) for internet-based Jonathan Coulton covers band 'The Mandelbrot Set'. Cover versions are something I generally steer clear of, mainly because I have little enough time to record my own music without revisiting something that somebody else has already recorded. However, I like JC's approach to music, and his use of the Creative Commons licence (as we used to release 'Difficult Second') means that people are free to record or perform covers of his songs without fear of having their arse sued out from under them.

The song (about zombies in the office environment) is still a work-in-progress, but a basic mix can be found by visiting the JoCo forums at www.jonathancoulton.com and following the link from my post tonight. When it is finished I'll stick a copy up here for easy access.

End of the offer

The 3-for-2 offer on our CDs has now come to an end, so your chances of getting hold of a limited 'Difficult Second' are slim if you missed the deadline. We have a handful left that will be distributed by other channels... Most likely as competition prizes or similar.

Of course, the album is still free to download via the web, and you can burn your own CD. In fact, burn a stack of them and give them to your friends!

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Tags: Jonathan Coulton, Zombies, Lunacy Board, Mandelbrot

Masters of Song Fu - Update #2 - First Impressions

After quite a bit of fiddling about I finished the new song last night, and it is now available for download at the Quick Stop voting page.

Don't forget to vote!

The song is called First Impressions and is a "Moon's-eye" view of the Earth and the influence of the Moon on us and vice-versa. The uke part I recorded didn't really sit with the style of the song, so I dropped it, but did keep a gentle little harmonica introduction and outro. I think this is the first time I've recorded a song with the mouth organ - it's not something I play very often, but it sits here quite well and is a little reminder of the portable nature of this recording.

---

Tags: Song Fu, Moon, moothie, harmonica

The Lunacy Board - 3 Albums in 3 Days

This is the news I've been waiting to announce - it's a big undertaking, so we wanted to make sure it would all come together and so far everything is going to plan. As you know, there has been a flurry of recording activity for The Lunacy Board's first album - plenty of details here in posts over the last few weeks, but what hasn't been mentioned is that the soundtrack material for the Stockholm film is also completed, having been recorded alongside the main Board album. It made some sort of sense to release these together, so why not make it a trio of substantially different, yet complementary albums?

Yes, we're releasing three full albums in three days.

Eponymous Debut

The first album will be released on the 13th of July 2008. This is the one with all the songs, including a couple that have been available to download from www.lunacyboard.com for a while now. It has unexpectedly turned out to be a concept album, or at least to have an underlying theme. Full details are available here, including the ability to pre-order a copy now to be amongst the first to hear it.

Difficult Second

The second album will be released on the 14th of July 2008. It will be part of the 'Album-a-Day' project, being written, recorded and published within a 24 hour period immediately following the release of the first album. Sounds like a suitably daft thing to do, but the idea is to open up the improvisational and collaborational nature of the Board so that anybody watching the live webcast can contribute an idea, as well as keeping us well-and-truly on our toes for the day. I can't describe what will be on it, as it will all be inspired on the day, but you're welcome to be a part of it!

No risk with this one - not only will you be able to hear it being constructed, but it will also be available as a free download at the end of the 24 hours. If you really want it on CD, we're doing a very limited run of signed, numbered copies for anybody who pre-orders both the other albums. Further details are available here.

Stockholm

Our instrumental soundtrack album will be released on 15th of July 2008. Featuring almost entirely improvised pieces recorded over the lifespan of the band, which form the soundtrack to the forthcoming animated film "Stockholm", this album travels from rhythm-led rock numbers via jazzy interludes to sinister ambient soundscapes. Full details, pre-order information and downloadable samples are available here.

It's been hard work and a lot of fun getting this all together, so get your pre-orders in and put the 13th/14th of July in your diaries to join us at the webcast!

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Tags: The Lunacy Board, Quintilis, Eponymous, Debut, Difficult, Second, Stockholm, pre-order, webcast

Lunacy Launch

Happy New Year!

The Lunacy Board have now officially launched, with our first track "The Unofficial National Anthem" being available for download from our website at www.lunacyboard.com.

The song is an unusually upbeat number featuring a fairly standard rock base (drums, bass, guitars), layered vocals, a little theremin and a spot of organ. It is probably the most accessible music we've attempted so far, though there are enough weird things going on to appeal to more warped tastes (such as my own).

The new website will be our base of operations for the foreseeable future. As well as musical offerings, we'll be providing various other creative outpourings including poetry, prose and videos. As a small taster I've put on a test demo of a scene from our forthcoming drama "Stockholm" - watch out for more little nuggets in the future.

Wishing you all the best for 2007, with The Lunacy Board providing the soundtrack!

Miniminiminiminiminalistic

Final Track of the Week

Phill Up The Glass

Week 17 of the grand mp3 download extravaganza.

For the last 'Track of the Week' (at least for the next few months), here's another original track from the Bordet / Leigh spin-off album 'Mux-Ip'. You may have guessed from the name that it is inspired by the music of Philip Glass, in which case you'd be correct. However, the track started life quite differently as a study in using bird song in music. I transcribed the songs of a number of birds in the local area, with the plan of building up a whole piece of music, but on listening closely found that the repetition occuring naturally, when put in a musical context, ended up coming out like a minimalist piece, so I went the whole hog and filled out the birdsong themes with those repetitive-sounding arpeggios beloved of the minimalist movement.

This was one of the last pieces I wrote using the music computer I bought some years earlier (a Yamaha CX5M) and which required every note to be manually entered one at a time.

That's it from the Deserters archives for the time being. I hope you've enjoyed the music as much as I've enjoyed re-visiting the past. Normal service will now be resumed, so don't forget to check back for news of current activities (or use the RSS feed if you know about such things).

Click here to download.

Why Doesn't Somebody Buy Him A Guitar?

Track of the Week

Soundtrack of a B-Movie

Week 16 of the grand mp3 download extravaganza.

In one of the periods between Deserters activity in the late 80's, Jennifer Leigh & I recorded a limited run album called 'Mux-Ip', which was a collection of cover versions and originals performed as a duo. This week's track, 'Soundtrack of a B-Movie', comes from that album (as does next week's track).

This was one of my earliest uses of multi-track recording, and was recorded using a mini keyboard (a Yamaha SHS-10) and a dodgy Strat copy guitar. The low-budget nature of this track is emphasised by the lack of the original recordings to take this from, so this is a 3rd generation cassette copy. It does, however, have a certain charm, despite its failings.

The piece is effectively a 6 minute guitar solo with cheesy auto-keyboard percussion, some synth pads and the occasional effect (tubular bells, radio clips, etc.)

Click here to download.

Complexion Like Mouldy Corned Beef

Track of the Week

Heavy Metal Ballad

Week 15 of the grand mp3 download extravaganza.

We're coming towards the end of this run of free downloadable goodies. Whilst there is more Deserters music in the archives, it's not yet in a form suitable for the web. I've probably got enough for another two weeks, so enjoy it while it lasts.

This week we have a song which has a title which is a bit of a misnomer - 'Heavy Metal Ballad' - as it is neither heavy metal, nor a ballad. It has a similar feel to 'One Night in the Back of a Fire Engine', but deals with the teen angst of spots, dental hygiene and body odour. Simple and upbeat, with a bit of a nasty streak. Lyrics by Lee Newe, once again, with music by yours truly.

Click here to download.

Polish the Blade

Track of the Week

The Complete 1978 Song

Week 14 of the grand mp3 download extravaganza.

This song has a similar feel to 'The Woman In Red', however this is certainly no love story, but a very sparsely arranged murder ballad, inspired by the story of Lizzie Borden. Music and Lyrics are by Lee Newe on this one, which has a bit of a strange history.

It started life as a heavy metal celebration of biker life; "Motorbike, Motorbike, Do what you like. I'm gonna pull a chick on Saturday Night." The original lyrics by Lee were put to music by yours truly, but never recorded. Probably just as well. I do still have a backing track for it somewhere, but the final song was a definite improvement on the original.

Click here to download.

Eat Your Greens

Track of the Week

My Wee Green Buddy

Week 13 of the grand mp3 download extravaganza.

If you liked the 'Yet Another Granfalloon' pieces, then this short instrumental ditty should be of interest. It's an earlier attempt at a similar style, in this case purely electronic, owing much to Zappa's 'Jazz From Hell' album.

It takes its name from a series of books by Robert Rankin which feature (amongst many other things) a time-travelling sprout called Barry who takes up residence in Elvis Presley's brain and uses him to re-write history. Yep, it sounds pretty daft, and it, in fact, is. But it's a bit of fun, and if you like Douglas Adams and / or Frank Zappa then why not give it a try. Rankin's a bit of a Zappa / Beefheart fan, and loads of references appear all through most of his books, not least of which is the brilliantly titled "Sprout Mask Replica".

Click here to download.

The Drevulon Adventure

Track of the Week

Drevulon Poseiden

Week 12 of the grand mp3 download extravaganza.

Another track featuring the Newe/Bordet - lyrics/music writing combination, this track deals with urban alienation and the suppression of the man in the street. Guest stars Andy on guitar - a pretty nice solo - and features yours truly on vocals for a change.

That's us caught back up with schedule, so back to normal next week, hopefully.

Click here to download.

Montepaldé on the Keys

Track of the Week

Makkie's Rhythm

Week 11 of the grand mp3 download extravaganza.

Time to wind the clock back again... This track comes from our second single, 'Banned Practice', and is a solo keyboard piece performed by Montepaldé Pentel on the Farfisa organ. Some years later this piece would be digitally combined with samples from the 'Banned Practice' sessions to create an extended piece, but this is the original in its simple, lo-fi glory.

Click here to download.

Yet Again

Track of the Week

Yet Another Granfalloon (3rd movement)

Week 10 of the grand mp3 download extravaganza.

The final part of the Granfalloon piece exists in two versions. This one is a computer generated version used to write the score; the other is a recorded version with four guitar parts: electric, acoustic, bass and ebow. The live version is unfortunately dreadful, so this version is the closest the suite gets to completion. Without the real instruments the piece lacks the variety of parts 1 and 2, so hopefully I'll get round to re-recording it some day. Don't hold your breath, though.

Click here to download.

User Fiendly

Track of the Week

Brain Drain Rap

Week 9 of the grand mp3 download extravaganza.

OK, I missed a couple of weeks. Here's a concerted effort to fill the gap...

This song was written by Lee, and deals with the general user-unfriendliness of computers. This was written in a time before Windows, when the Sinclair empire was still king (in the UK, at least), hard disks cost about the same as a small car and held less data than a mobile phone does today. Things have improved since then. Or have they?

The song is written as a kind of cheesy rap, totally programmed into the computer with only a short acoustic (mandolin) part at the end, and represents an ongoing battle against the computerised world. The part of the computer is played by a ZX Spectrum speech synthesiser - cutting edge stuff in its day!

Click here to download.

E-Bow Heaven

Track of the Week

Mask of Deceit (excerpt)

Week 8 of the grand mp3 download extravaganza.

Here's last week's missing track... It is an EBow solo from my song 'Mask of Deceit' which deals with and was inspired by similar circumstances to Peter Hammill's excellent album, 'Over', i.e. the breakdown of a reasonably long-term relationship under less than honest conditions. It was an exercise in venting of anger and feelings of betrayal, but the vocal on it is just so awful that I always skip past to the good bit. Which is what we have here.

It's about a minute's worth of an EBow solo, backed by piano and electric guitar. It has a very languid and fluid style, and is probably one of my favourite bits of my own guitar work. For those not familiar with the EBow, it is a gadget which attempts to allow guitarists a bit more expression like a violinist, by creating a magnetic field close to the strings which allows the notes to sound continuously without fading away. Due to the way it works it also seems to generate overtones of its own, creating a quite recognisable sound. It has been used by many guitarists, usually as a special effect for a single track, but John 'Fury' Ellis (of the Stranglers and the K Group) uses it regularly, and it was also apparently used by Big Country as part of the 'guitars-as-bagpipes' sound.

Click here to download.